{"id":13,"date":"2018-05-30T14:16:00","date_gmt":"2018-05-30T14:16:00","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2024-11-07T13:00:45","modified_gmt":"2024-11-07T12:00:45","slug":"how-to-speak-persuasively-in-your-own-skin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lucilleossai.com\/blog\/2018\/05\/30\/how-to-speak-persuasively-in-your-own-skin\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Speak Persuasively…In Your Own Skin"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Note: This article was updated in November 2024.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

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A pounding heart.<\/p>\n

A dry mouth.<\/p>\n

Lungs devoid of air, and wobbly legs threatening to give way as I slowly advanced to the stage.<\/p>\n

When I opened my mouth, a squeaky, panicky voice I didn’t recognise burst forth…<\/p>\n

Those physical symptoms I experienced when called upon to read a few lines at an event were overwhelming.<\/p>\n

And that was all I was required to do: read. Yet, at the time, I’d have gratefully chosen the option of the earth opening and consuming me, instead of speaking in front of an unfamiliar audience.<\/p>\n

The anxiety was real, so I get it when some statistics show that\u00a0 40% of us suffer from glossophobia<\/span><\/a>\u2014anxiety and\/or phobia of public speaking\u2014and that most people prefer death to public speaking.<\/p>\n

I think that figure is conservative,\u00a0however, because I’ve read accounts of many professional speakers admitting to being nervous before events.<\/p>\n

So I’m not alone and neither are you. Extroverts are not exempt either. In your professional or entrepreneurial journey, you will <\/strong>face that panic, with the accompanying physical and psychological symptoms, when you’re poised to give a speech\/presentation\/keynote to an (intimidating) audience.<\/p>\n

And trust me, it won’t matter if you’ve given that presentation a hundred times, or if you can recite that speech in your sleep. Those moments of woe can suddenly strike, leaving you raw and emotionally drained just before, and even during <\/em>the event.<\/p>\n

Numerous suggestions are available to help you navigate the path to fearless public speaking. This post from Harvard Business Review<\/a><\/span>\u00a0lists practical points that will help.<\/p>\n

Moreover, preparation begets confidence. Therefore, practise thoroughly before<\/em> the event, and you\u2019d become less fearful and more convinced that you\u2019d do well.<\/p>\n

Visualising yourself performing brilliantly also works wonders. Don\u2019t scoff at this idea.<\/p>\n

Experts even recommend diaphragmatic breathing, or deep breathing, for calming nerves and for powerful vocals.<\/p>\n

You should also expand your knowledge by taking courses, reading materials or watching videos online.\u00a0 As I’ve advised elsewhere on this blog, joining your local Toastmasters Club and watching TED talks will hone your public speaking skills.<\/p>\n

Additionally, getting coached by experts in the field or adopting their recommendations will expose you to best practices.<\/p>\n

For example:<\/p>\n

I)\u00a0Patricia Fripp<\/a><\/span>, a Hall of Fame speaker, uses techniques gleaned from over 30 years of public speaking experience to teach you how to conduct compelling presentations and inspiring keynotes.<\/p>\n

II) Nancy Duarte<\/a><\/span> is also an authority on presentations. She and her team regularly share tested methods for masterful outcomes.<\/p>\n

III) John Zimmer<\/a> is an internationally recognised speaker and expert on public speaking, presentation skills, and persuasion. He shares insightful content to elevate your speaking skills.<\/p>\n

IV) Dr Gary Genard, who developed The Genard Method<\/a><\/span>\u2014specialised public speaking training based on techniques of the theatre\u2014helps you ‘perform’ dynamic presentations.<\/p>\n

V) Suzannah Baum<\/a><\/span> is great for unleashing your speaking potential\u2014in a charming manner.<\/p>\n

Therefore, you needn’t search far for solutions to your public speaking challenges. Nevertheless, note that it’s easy to get overwhelmed by the information you receive. You could also become convinced that those useful tips won’t work for you because of your unique personality or circumstance.<\/p>\n

Specifically, you want to stay true to yourself; you don’t want to morph into someone inauthentic by pretending to be someone you’re not.<\/p>\n

Again, I get it.<\/p>\n

My ‘situation’ is almost a contradiction: an introvert who’s a communications trainer\/coach, who has lectured to a group of over 85 people in a packed room, and who has led focus groups, facilitated seminars and delivered one-on-one coaching sessions.\u00a0Through all these activities, it was important that I felt at ease, but prepared.<\/p>\n

So fellow introverts<\/a><\/span>,\u00a0 don’t despair – you can still be yourselves and<\/em> become convincing speakers. After all, Barack Obama, Nelson Mandela and even Gandhi, labelled introverts, were known for their persuasive deliveries in their roles.<\/p>\n

Those who know me personally might wonder how I’m able to do those things since I’m most comfortable being left alone to do my best work. Well, below are techniques that work for me. They could be tweaked for your circumstance:<\/p>\n

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1) Prioritise your audience’s needs<\/strong><\/h3>\n

This is the number one rule for effective communication in general.<\/p>\n

In public speaking, whether you’re giving a speech, presentation or delivering a paper, consider what will be relevant to your audience. Then prepare the content so that whatever you share is useful<\/em>. Eliminate good-to-know information that bears no significance to the needs of your audience members. Remember that they decide in 30 seconds or less, whether whatever you’re talking about will be worth their attention.<\/p>\n

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You should also consider how to open your session with a bang<\/a><\/span>\u00a0so that you ‘hook’ your audience from the moment you open your mouth.<\/p>\n

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2) Keep your message simple, brief and clear<\/strong><\/h3>\n

The ‘curse of knowledge’ is real, and well-meaning speakers often fall into its enticing trap. This happens when you’re so knowledgeable about the subject matter that you use the language you assume is understood by your audience. Apart from loading your speech\/presentation with jargon, you delve into the complexities of your topic in painful detail.<\/p>\n

Even if your audience members are a learned bunch, attention spans wane easily and you’d lose them quickly if you waffle on.<\/p>\n

Moreover, avoid being lost in your world that you don’t communicate a clear call-to-action for your audience to take after your talk.<\/p>\n

In other words, adhere to what I’ve coined as the three ‘beacons of effective communication’ on this blog: Keep your message simple<\/em>, brief <\/em>and clear<\/em>. Your audience will be grateful for your precision.<\/p>\n

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3) Share your story <\/strong><\/h3>\n

Even though you shouldn’t tire your audience with too much relevant information, it’s always reassuring for them to learn about your struggles and how you overcame them. These stories make you human and thus relatable.<\/p>\n

Storytelling is a compelling tool that connects you with your audience. It’s also one of the easiest ways for them to remember your messages.<\/p>\n

You don’t need to be an orator to share your experiences. Just tell your stories as you would to a trusted friend, but remember to use the appropriate language.<\/p>\n

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4) Unleash your vocal power<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Your voice is a useful asset, giving you different ‘flavours’ and richness depending on how it’s used. This cheat sheet to vocal dynamics<\/a><\/span> explains how to tweak your voice to influence people.<\/p>\n

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5) Use positive nonverbal cues<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Maintaining eye contact, smiling, gesturing naturally, and using movement (where appropriate) to highlight your points, all make your sessions engaging.<\/p>\n

Use pauses. They can be effective tools that allow your points ‘marinate’ in the psyche of your audience. Don’t overdo them,\u00a0however. You don\u2019t want to appear insecure.<\/p>\n

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Avoid ‘defensive’ body language cues like frowning, folding arms across the chest, rolling eyes, and glaring. Similarly, distracting gestures such as incessant blinking, tapping on tables, or repetitive ticks (smoothening hair, adjusting ties, clasping and unclasping hands, etc.) turn your audience’s attention away<\/em> from you. Eventually, they will disconnect.<\/p>\n

Don’t lose your audience to negative nonverbal behaviours.<\/p>\n

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6) Control your Q&A sessions<\/strong><\/h3>\n

One of the most useful components in your public speaking toolkit is your question-and-answer (Q&A) session.<\/p>\n

A great Q&A session will make up for the errors you made in your speech\/presentation. It is also an opportunity for you to reclaim lost ground, and once more demonstrate how your expertise can solve your audience’s concerns.<\/p>\n

But it must be handled in the right way.<\/p>\n

As Craig Valentine<\/a><\/span>,\u00a0 the 1999 World Champion of Public Speaking for Toastmasters International, advises: Never end your speech with the Q&A session.<\/p>\n

This is a salient point because such sessions could become rowdy, and you could lose the goodwill you’ve enjoyed or the connection you’ve made during the event. In this post<\/a><\/span>,\u00a0 the seasoned speaker explains the techniques for making your Q&A sessions memorable.<\/p>\n

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7) End on a high note\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/h3>\n

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If you’re like me, then ‘investing’ yourself in a public speaking activity can be mentally draining, especially if the Q&A stint is brutal. Still, persevere and resist the urge to ‘check out’ before your conclusion.<\/p>\n

Just like your opening statement, your parting remarks are important because they reiterate your main idea.<\/p>\n

I try to end with a declarative phrase or a short sentence in my sessions, where feasible. For example, at the end of one training session on business writing, I mouthed the words below:<\/p>\n

“Once you know the rules, there’s no one on this planet who wouldn\u2019t be able to write to<\/em>“.<\/p>\n

It was refreshing to see the reactions of members of the audience.<\/p>\n

You can,\u00a0however, try other suggestions for ending your oral engagements. Nonetheless, what you should note is that your audience tends to remember your openings and closings the most, so make them remarkable.<\/p>\n

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Conclusion<\/strong><\/h3>\n

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You could read all the tips for overcoming public speaking anxiety; you could watch the videos, and you could practise the best-kept secrets, but remember this:<\/p>\n

The nervousness doesn’t disappear completely.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s fine. It just means that you\u2019d need to challenge yourself each time you\u2019re required to speak in public.<\/p>\n

And what about those physical manifestations of the anxiety I described at the beginning? Well, I survived the incident and learned what not<\/em> to do in the future.<\/p>\n

Therefore, if there’s one piece of advice I’d stress, it’s this:<\/p>\n

It’s not about you and what you know. Make everything about the value you can provide for your audience. You’d connect more meaningfully with them as a result.<\/p>\n

Be yourself. Everything else will follow and you’d speak persuasively in your own skin.<\/p>\n

And now, over to you:<\/p>\n

What other public speaking techniques have helped you in your career?<\/p>\n

Kindly post your comments below.<\/p>\n

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If you enjoyed this post don’t rush off just yet. Please remember to:<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

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