The first time it was given, I stood there awkwardly, smiling and nodding. I wasn’t prepared to handle an unexpected standing ovation.
It was at the end of a communication session I’d facilitated for MBA students at the FT-ranked Lagos Business School. I can’t remember the MBA cohort or the year, but I remember how surreal it was — and how validated I felt that my insights were appreciated.
Then as the years went by, I learned to accept them with more grace and gratitude.
But I also recognised the danger:
The standing ovations could become the ONLY yardstick for measuring the usefulness of my speaking or training programmes.
So, on the one hand, the quest for them would guide me to sharpen my material and delivery.
On the other hand, even though a standing ovation would be a sign that my delivery was memorable, what would happen when I wasn’t ‘rewarded’ with one? Would my content be any less valuable?
As I began to assess my performance as facilitator, trainer and speaker in different contexts, some of which I received no standing ovations, I realised one liberating truth:
A standing ovation is nice. But impact lingers and transforms.
Once I came to terms with the fact that out of every 10 speaking or training stints I deliver, I might receive only four or five standing ovations, I started to focus on transformation instead.
You may be preparing for an important speech, presentation, or other context where your verbal communication needs to influence people. But if you believe standing ovations are the ultimate markers of success, remember the two declarations below:
1) Your validation comes from the impact you make, not what you ‘win’
And this point is not only what I’ve realised about my speaking.
For example, for seven years, I’ve had the honour of leading the judging panel for the Mini-Keynote Competition at Lagos Business School. I proposed the competition and helped launch its maiden edition in 2019. Every year since its inception, I’ve also coached the speakers before they take the stage.
As with all competitions, not everyone wins. But when those who didn’t win shared what they learned from the experience, and even how the audience responded to them, it became clear what was truly important:
The sway of their speaking and how their delivery inspired the audience to think differently.
One of the speakers in this year’s competition was kind enough to email me her experience. Hers was one of the keynotes I enjoyed, although she wasn’t among the top three winners.
Screenshot 1
Note that the proof of successful speaking is the impact it makes.
Lesson for you:
When preparing for your next important speech, presentation, board brief, or keynote, don’t prepare for the applause or standing ovation.
Instead:
- Ask yourself the foundational question to zero in on the most important angle for your audience.
- Use the ABF Formula™ to ensure your communication is structured.
- Apply the appropriate nonverbal cues that help you build trust quickly with your audience.
- Practise how to handle a tough Q&A (if allotted one), so you project the confidence required to influence people.
- End strong with a call to action, a forward-looking statement, or by closing an open (story) loop.
Impact follows demonstrated value.
2) Your influence is ‘felt’ when your focus shifts to the audience
Last month, I was invited to facilitate a day-long communication programme for emerging leaders of one of the country’srespectable oil companies.
I’d prepared for the programme and ensured it was very interactive, with tasks for the participants, including brief speaking stints. Despite some tech glitches at the beginning, the programme flowed well, judging from the nonverbal behaviours and conversations afterwards.
And yes, I received rousing applause at the end.
Screenshot 2
By all indications, it was an above-average programme, and I expected a minimum rating of 4.9/5 (the highest I’ve received from leadership cohorts and younger professionals).
I received a 4.6/5.
Screenshot 3
After my initial disappointment, I asked the programme manager about the highest facilitator scores in the same programme. I was told it was 4.6, and that three facilitators (including me) received that rating. The feedback took the sting out of my disappointment at scoring below my self-assigned benchmark.
But the participants’ comments reminded me once more to look beyond the applause to realise that impact was more important.
Screenshot 4
When I prepared for the sessions, I kept the audience as my north star, challenging myself to focus only on insights, frameworks, and practical tips they could use to sharpen their communication and influence people.
Screenshot 5
My delivery was anchored on being present and as helpful as possible to the audience. And that focus paid off, as most commented on the usefulness of the sessions.
Lesson for you:
Focus on the audience. Share what would shift when they change their mindset about something (based on what you’ve shared) or do something differently (no matter how little). Show them what’s possible.
Your influence will be ‘felt’ when your entire focus shifts from how you’ll be perceived to how you can empower the audience to achieve more in their lives.
Conclusion
So, just like I’ve realised when speaking, training or facilitating sessions, the impact of my delivery isn’t measured by a standing ovation or a high rating — although both signal a memorable delivery.
Whether you’re a professional, executive, or leader, the proof that your speaking is successful shouldn’t be predominantly about the bells and whistles.
The true measure of your speaking should be whether you inspire action or influence your audience to feel or think differently, so they can do something that will change their lives for the better.
A positive audience experience doesn’t automatically translate to transformation. But when that experience is memorable, it’s more likely to lead to the deliberate behaviours that shift results. Focus on that impact, and your influence will outlive your performance.
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N.B: First image is courtesy of Stuart Miles, via freedigitalphots.net. Screenshots are courtesy of Lucille Ossai. Last image is courtesy of Geralt via Pixabay.